Wednesday, December 21, 2011

You Can't Take Me Anywhere!

We finally got the whole family in one room long enough to take Daughter out for her Birthday meal.
Of course, as is her bent, she picked the most expensive restaurant around here to celebrate in.

We've never been to a Benihana-style teppenyaki restaurant before.
You sit at a table with a grill in the center and a chef cooks your food in front of you....a chef who makes it an entertainment by telling jokes, singing and throwing knives in the air.

So the five of us sat at a table and the meal began.
Now everyone in my little family has a great sense of humor.  We are sarcastic but we aren't demonstrative and boisterous when it comes to partying.....well MOST of us aren't.

But once the chef started squirting sake into my mouth from the big squeeze bottle he toted around, let's just say I was feeling no pain after about 3 quirts. ;-)
Or as he kept saying, "Mo' sake, mo' happy!" lol

Now that my kids are grown or almost grown I can let my hair down a bit and be the wild party girl of my distant youth....much too their embarrassment.

The almost 16 year old wants to disown me.
The 19 year old told Facebook and appears to be proud of me.
The almost 21 year old wants to go do shots with me this summer.

I am not a bad drunk.
I am a quiet drunk who gets the giggles and then falls asleep after a very small amount of alcohol.
I loosened up and got "into" the experience.
I laughed and clapped.
I caught veggies in my mouth as they sailed through the air at me.
I caught sake in my mouth as it sailed through the air at me.
It was great and controlled until the chef pulled a rubber chicken out of the top of his toque.

That's when I lost my proverbial shit.

I got so tickled I couldn't stop laughing that contagious laugh that makes everyone else laugh.  And then I see everyone else laughing so I laugh harder until my stomach hurts from laughing and I have tears rolling down my legs(yes, Judy, that's for you!).

Of course when you haven't eaten anything substantial and you've had SQUEEZE BOTTLE SAKE SHOTS for a half an hour and you can't hold your liquor,'s not a pretty picture.
But it is HIGHLY amusing to all around you!

Hubs made me take my chopstick training wheels with me(a plastic thing to keep the sticks from separating that Asian people give to their toddlers to teach them how to eat with them).  I had one gifted to me earlier this year by an Asian woman at a restaurant who felt sorry for my lack of skills.

The evening is rather fuzzy in my mind so I have NO clue what I am doing in this photo(yes, it's not very becoming of me, but what the hell)....or is that even my hand holding them?  I just don't know.
Notice however #2 son trying to conceal his uncontrollable laughter at his inebriated mother who he has never seen tipsy before.

And here is the Birthday girl and her surprise dessert...

She's either impersonating the chef who called me "little mommy" by the end of our session, or laughing at me not being able to stop laughing or laughing at me trying to lick the sake off the table when it spilled or laughing at me trying to string a rational sentence together.
At any rate, she is laughing at me.

And no, I didn't abandon my family and go sit at the next table when our chef and his squeeze bottle of sake moved over there.
I do have SOME dignity left......maybe.

Being with my family was fun but I think next time I'll rather take some internet friends when I go.  I know some you reading this would make wonderful dinner companions at a place like this.
And I promise to behave.....unless of course, the chef has a rubber chicken in his hat.



  1. I am so there but might nee to wear a diaper. Because my friend I am a on drunk drink...and once i start laughing oh you know what will happen

    Dont worry the kids will recover

  2. the kids know! You are funny. No, I don't think that was your hand! Laughing is the best thing. Oh, the laughing until the stomach hurts is awful. Tears down your legs? You peed in your pants? LOL

    I sent you an email tonight! And, turnips.

  3. COUNT ME IN! Looks like a wonderful time, I'm so happy for all of you.
    I usually embarrass DJ and Anna thinks its great. Maybe that will change.
    So are we going to do BlogWhore mixed with Benihanas?

  4. It's official. I love a drunk Sluggy more than a sober one. Have you ever blogged while drunk? It's so much fun!

  5. lol! I'll go with you!!! We went to one of these places once and the chef guy at our table lost control of one of his flippy knives and it flew threw the air and hit the ground between my kids...

  6. Licking the sake off the table Sluggy? Littlest yelled at me from the tub to stop laughing at my computer.

  7. We have a place like this 1/4 mile from my home...we didn't go for 9 years and since it was still in business we gave it a whirl. It's a great dining experience. They do all the things you described...we go often now but it is very expensive especially since by 14yo discover Filet Mignon! Love the Holiday bling on your blog ;)

  8. It sounds like the a most hilarious evening. Wish I had been there!

  9. Oh my! I cannot tell you how much I love this red design. Keep it forever. This will be where I hang out...the red place with sparkles and hearts.

  10. Whoa on the Christmas background girlie, my eyes are burning, hee, hee cheers to you Sluggy my good friend!


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